Saturday, November 06, 2004

old news, but hilarious

taken from www.brianbaute.com


All I Need to Know About John Kerry I Learned at JibJab.com

What I learned about John Kerry from JibJab.com:
1. He won three Purple Hearts.
2. He's not George W. Bush.
3. Uh, he won three Purple Hearts.

What I learned about John Kerry during his acceptance speech at the Democratic National Convention:
1. He won three Purple Hearts.
2. He's not George W. Bush.
3. Uh, he won three Purple Hearts.

Bill Clinton spoke on Monday night at the convention and hit a solid double in the gap.
Barack Obama spoke Tuesday night and hit a home run.
John Edwards spoke Wednesday night and hit a grand slam over the Monster and into the parking garage across Landsdowne.
And last night John Kerry hit a ducksnort in the 5.5 hole between short and third and beat the throw at first by half a step to eek out a single. He was largely emotionless and seemed to be forcing himself to try to be just a little bit enthusiastic. And the content of his speech was terribly disappointing to me. I really hoped he would use this opportunity to tell us what he's all about rather than more of the same about what he's not...

It's sad, but elections turn on things like that now. Notice how Kerry was very careful to speak for 45 minutes last night in his introduction to the country and hardly ever mention anything he ever did in his 20 years in the Senate. His record doesn't matter. His policies don't matter. Only his charisma and eloquence matter. Which is why, if Kerry loses this year, John Edwards will be President of the United States in 2008.Editorializing about Kerry's speech, the LA Times deadpanned, " Over four days of the Democratic convention, we have come to suspect that John F. Kerry may have served in Vietnam." Yeah, there was a vague sense of that.
posted by Rick and Christie
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