Tuesday, June 28, 2005

blue collar comedy

It's rather, eh, interesting, I guess, visiting different churches. This weekend I went with my family to a small church they've been attending for a while. I sat on the pew, trying to decide if I was delusional, or if I really was in a scene from The Apostle. Thankfully, before the steel guitar got too loud, my nephew had to use the bathroom. Escape. On the way to the potty, even four year old Daniel expressed feelings about his dismay with the service. He said he was going to tell the preacher that church wouldn't be quite so boring if he'd talk about something interesting like animals. I guess it's not too much to ask a preacher to throw in a couple illustrations about dinosaurs or squids, is it? I mean, the least he could do is talk about the Gadarene swine or Balaam's ass or something. You know, be all things to all people - even if they're little. Well, after extending this conversation and the potty break about as long as I could get away with, I realized my return was inevitable. I arrived back just in time to hear several people stand up and involve themselves in rather long stories that included vivid imagery of others ailments and body parts. A little too much information if you ask me. It all culminated rather nicely when the man sitting just a few rows ahead of me, I think supposedly expressing his agreement with something that was said, actually, in audible words uttered the phrase, "git-r-done." Yes, I said "git-r-done." As I endured the rest of the service, somehow, the thought kept running though my mind, "Please tell me you're kidding, or kill me." Unfortunately, neither happened.
posted by Christie