Sunday, July 17, 2005

say what?

The Dialectizer is hilarious. Here, I've translated my last post into "jive."

Props to Micah fuh da 411.

Just in case some uh ya' dun didn't know, so cut me some slack, Jack...we live in de middle uh nowhere. We is two, count em' two, hours fum some mall, restaurants, Target, etcetera. WORD! When we fust moved here, some sucka told us about dis great mall only fo'ty-five minutes away. Slap mah fro! ah' wuz elated. However, when ah' arrived and saw dat Goody's wuz de main sto'e in dis "mall" - ah' realized dat da sucka' who'd directed me dere had obviously been isolated fo' far t'lengdy some puh'iod uh time. Well, de misfo'tune uh our locale gots caused us t'greatly enjoy our trips t'de big city, howeva' few and far between dey may be. We've recently realized dough, plum how baaaad it's gotsten. 'S coo', bro. We received some gift certificate at Christmas fo' one uh our favo'ite restaurants - and only dis weekend dun did we actually dig t'use it. Man! And afta' all de wait, ah' ended down digtin' sick t'my stomach and leavin' Rick in de restaurant t'eat while ah' went outside and laid waaay down in de vehicle. ah' dun did, at least, dig t'enjoy mah' bruschetta befo'e da nausea hit. Man!..and some trip t'de mall. And nope, dere wuzn't some Goody's in dis one. Dankfully. Slap mah fro!

And I couldn't resist translating the 23rd Psalm either. From King James, to "Elmer Fudd." Whod've ever guessed.

De Wowd is my Shephewd; I shaww not want. He makef me to wie down in gween pastuwes: He weadef me beside the stiww watews. Oh, dat scwewy wabbit! He westowef my souw: He weadef me in the paths of wighteousness fow His name' sake. Yea, though I wawk thwough the vawwey of the shadow of death, I wiww feaw no eviw: Fow thou awt wif me; Dy wod and thy staff, they comfowt me. Dou pwepawest a tabwe befowe me in the pwesence of mine enemies; Dou annointest my head wif oiw; My cup wunnef ovew. Suwewy goodness and mewcy shaww fowwow me aww the days of my wife, and I wiww dweww in the House of the Wowd fowevew.
posted by Christie